Glororum (n.)

One who takes pleasure in informing others about their bowel movements.

Glororum

Minchinhampton (n.)

The expression on a man's face when he has just zipped up his trousers without due care and attention.

Minchinhampton

Frosses (pl.n.)

The lecherous looks exchanged between sixteen-year-olds at a party given by someone's parents.

Frosses

Polbathic (adj.)

Gifted with ability to manipulate taps using only the feet.

Polbathic

Dobwalls (pl.n.)

The now hard-boiled bits of nastiness which have to be prised off crockery by hand after it has been through a dishwasher.

Dobwalls

Scorrier (n.)

A small hunting dog trained to snuffle amongst your private parts.

Scorrier

Clathy (adj.)

Nervously indecisive about how safely to dispose of a dud lightbulb.

Clathy

Tumby (n.)

The involuntary abdominal gurgling which fills the silence following someone else's intimate personal revelation.

Tumby

Baumber (n.)

A fitted elasticated bottom sheet which turns your mattress banana shaped.

Baumber

Glemenuilt (n.)

The kind of guilt which you'd completely forgotten about which comes roaring back on discovering an old letter in a cupboard.

Glemenuilt

Tillicoultry (n.)

The man-to-man chumminess adopted by an employer as a prelude for telling an employee that he's going to have to let him go.

Tillicoultry

Alltami (n.)

The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps.

Alltami

Happle (vb.)

To annoy people by finishing their sentences for them and then telling them what they really meant to say.

Happle

Lochranza (n.)

The long unaccomplished wail in the middle of a Scottish folk song where the pipes nip around the corner for a couple of drinks.

Lochranza

Smearisary (n.)

That part of a kitchen wall reserved for the schooltime daubings of small children.

Smearisary

Melcombe regis (n.)

The name of the style of decoration used in cocktail lounges in mock Tudor hotels in Surrey.

Melcombe regis

Forsinain (n. archaic)

The right of the lord of the manor to molest dwarves on their birthdays.

Forsinain

Plympton (n.)

The (pointless) knob on top of a war memorial.

Plympton

Dibble (vb.)

To try to remove a sticky something from one hand with the other, thus causing it to get stuck to the other hand and eventually to anything else you try to remove it with.

Dibble

Scopwick (n.)

The flap of skin which is torn off you lip when trying to smoke an untipped cigarette.

Scopwick

Clackavoid (n.)

Technical BBC term for a page of dialogue from Blake's Seven.

Clackavoid

Tigharry (n.)

The accomplice or 'lure' who gets punters to participate in the three card trick on London streets by winning an improbable amount of money very easily.

Tigharry

Baughurst (n.)

That kind of large fierce ugly woman who owns a small fierce ugly dog.

Baughurst

Woking (participial vb.)

Standing in the kitchen wondering what you came in here for.

Woking

Aldclune (n.)

One who collects ten-year-old telephone directories.

Aldclune

Hambledon (n.)

The sound of a single-engine aircraft flying by, heard whilst lying in a summer field in England, which somehow concentrates the silence and sense of space and timelessness and leaves one with a profound feeling of something or other.

Hambledon

Lower Peover (n.)

Common solution to the problems of a humby (q.v.)

Lower Peover

Glazeley (adj.)

The state of a barrister's flat greasy hair after wearing a wig all day.

Glazeley

Shirmers (pl.n.)

Tall young men who stand around smiling at weddings as if to suggest that they know the bride rather well.

Shirmers

Marlow (n.)

The bottom drawer in the kitchen your mother keeps her paper bags in.

Marlow