Ardcrony (n.)

A remote acquaintance passed off as 'a very good friend of mine' by someone trying to impress people.

Ardcrony

Ardslignish (adj.)

Adjective which describes the behaviour of Sellotape when you are tired.

Ardslignish

Aynho (vb.)

Of waiters, never to have a pen.

Aynho

Ambleside (n.)

A talk given about the Facts of Life by a father to his son whilst walking in the garden on a Sunday afternoon.

Ambleside

Alltami (n.)

The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps.

Alltami

Aldclune (n.)

One who collects ten-year-old telephone directories.

Aldclune

Aird of Sleat (n. archaic)

Ancient Scottish curse placed from afar on the stretch of land now occupied by Heathrow Airport.

Aird of Sleat

Aigburth (n.)

Any piece of readily identifiable anatomy found amongst cooked meat.

Aigburth

Adrigole (n.)

The centrepiece of a merry-go-round on which the man with the tickets stands unnervingly still.

Adrigole

Affpuddle (n.)

A puddle which is hidden under a pivoted paving stone. You only know it's there when you step on the paving stone and the puddle shoots up your leg.

Affpuddle

Adlestrop (n.)

That part of a suitcase which is designed to get snarled up on conveyor belts at airports. Some of the more modern adlestrop designs have a special 'quick release' feature which enables the case to flip open at this point and fling your underclothes into the conveyor belt's gearing mechanism.

Adlestrop

Ainderby steeple (n.)

One who asks you a question with the apparent motive of wanting to hear your answer, but who cuts short your opening sentence by leaning forward and saying 'and I'll tell you why I ask...' and then talking solidly for the next hour.

Ainderby steeple

Articlave (n.)

A clever architectural construction designed to give the illusion from the top deck of a bus that it is far too big for the road.

Articlave

Amersham (n.)

The sneeze which tickles but never comes. (Thought to derive from the Metropolitan Line tube station of the same name where the rails always rattle but the train never arrives.)

Amersham

Affcot (n.)

The sort of fart you hope people will talk after.

Affcot

Ailene (adj.)

Descriptive of the pleasing coolness on the reverse side of the pillow.

Ailene

Araglin (n. archaic)

A medieval practical joke played by young squires on a knight aspirant the afternoon he is due to start his vigil. As the knight arrives at the castle the squires attempt to raise the drawbridge very suddenly as the knight and his charger step on to it.

Araglin

Abinger (n.)

One who washes up everything except the frying pan, the cheese grater and the saucepan which the chocolate sauce has been made in.

Abinger

Aberystwyth (n.)

A nostalgic yearning which is in itself more pleasant than the thing being yearned for.

Aberystwyth

Abercrave (vb.)

To strongly desire to swing from the pole on the rear footplate of a bus.

Abercrave