A piece of wood used to stir paint and thereafter stored uselessly in a shed in perpetuity.
Cotterstock
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
Bursledon (n.)
The bluebottle one is too tired to get up and start, but not tired enough to sleep through.
Bursledon
Bursledon
Sunday, July 29, 2012
High Limerigg (n.)
The topmost tread of a staircase which disappears when you're climbing the stairs in the darkness.
High Limerigg
High Limerigg
Saturday, July 28, 2012
Friday, July 27, 2012
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Blithbury (n.)
A look someone gives you by which you become aware that they're much too drunk to have understood anything you've said to them in the last twenty minutes.
Blithbury
Blithbury
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Monday, July 23, 2012
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Hoddlesden (n.)
An 'injured' footballer's limp back into the game which draws applause but doesn't fool anybody.
Hoddlesden
Hoddlesden
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Sittingbourne (n.)
One of those conversions where both people are waiting for the other one to shut up so they can get on with their bit.
Sittingbourne
Sittingbourne
Friday, July 20, 2012
Bolsover (n.)
One of those brown plastic trays with bumps on, placed upside down in boxes of chocolates to make you think you're-getting two layers.
Bolsover
Bolsover
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Silloth (n.)
Something that was sticky, and is now furry, found on the carpet under the sofa the morning after a party.
Silloth
Silloth
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Hoylake (n.)
The pool of edible gravy which surrounds an inedible and disgusting lump of meat - eaten to give the impression that the person is 'just not very hungry, but mmm this is delicious'. Cf. Peaslake - a similar experience had by vegetarians.
Hoylake
Hoylake
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Brisbane (n.)
A perfectly reasonable explanation (Such as the one offered by a person with a gurgling cough which has nothing to do with the fact that they smoke fifty cigarettes a day.)
Brisbane
Brisbane
Monday, July 16, 2012
Dogdyke (vb.)
Of dog-owners, to adopt the absurd pretence that the animal shitting in the gutter is nothing to do with them.
Dogdyke
Dogdyke
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Lowestoft (n.)
(a) The balls of wool which collect on nice new sweaters. (b) The correct name for 'navel fluff'.
Lowestoft
Lowestoft
Friday, July 13, 2012
Brough Sowerby (n.)
One who has been working at that same desk in the same office for fifteen years and has very much his own ideas about why he is continually passed over for promotion.
Brough Sowerby
Brough Sowerby
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Golant (adj.)
Blank, sly and faintly embarrassed. Pertaining to the expression seen on the face of someone who has clearly forgotten your name.
Golant
Golant
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Monday, July 9, 2012
Burnt Yates (pl. n.)
Condition to which yates (q.v.) will suddenly pass without any apparent interviewing period, after the spirit of the throckmorton (q.v.) has finally been summoned by incessant throcking (q.v.)
Burnt Yates
Burnt Yates
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Pott Shrigley (n.)
Dried remains of a week-old casserole, eaten when extremely drunk at two a.m.
Pott Shrigley
Pott Shrigley
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Clenchwarton (n. archaic)
One who assists an exorcist by squeezing whichever part of the possessed the exorcist deems useful.
Clenchwarton
Clenchwarton
Friday, July 6, 2012
Scrabby (n.)
A curious-shaped duster given to you by your mother which on closer inspection turns out to be half an underpant.
Scrabby
Scrabby
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Beaulieu Hill (n.)
The optimum vantage point from which one to view people undressing in the bedroom across the street.
Beaulieu Hill
Beaulieu Hill
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Tolstachaolais (phr.)
What the police in Leith require you to say in order to prove that you are not drunk.
Tolstachaolais
Tolstachaolais
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Ambleside (n.)
A talk given about the Facts of Life by a father to his son whilst walking in the garden on a Sunday afternoon.
Ambleside
Ambleside
Monday, July 2, 2012
Harpenden (n.)
The coda to a phone conversion, consisting of about eight exchanges, by which people try gracefully to get off the line.
Harpenden
Harpenden
Sunday, July 1, 2012
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